Guess where I went today? Work! Yep. For eight whole hours!
And it wasn't that bad. =)
I was lucky to have almost three months home with Isaac. It was like nothing I've ever experienced before. Sweet, difficult, nerve-wracking, cozy, cabin fever-y, frustrating, exhausting, dreamy. Would you believe me if I said it's already almost one big blur?!
The anticipation of going back to work was much worse than actually going back. In reality, it was... comfortable. The substitute teacher and my teaching assistants did a SUPERB job while I was gone! Although I thought about Isaac throughout the day, I did not worry about him one little bit. He will be spending the days with one of his doting grandmas and I can't even describe the peace of mind this gives me.
Plus I know that each day I get to come home to my smiley (or screaming. I'm sure we'll have those days too) little boy, spastic dog, and husband who's the greatest partner I could ever ask for. Life is good.
Obviously life has changed. I haven't slept for more than three hours in a row (and that only happened once. A blissful flukey nap) since July 20th. When I curl my hair I smell burning formula. I feel everything more intensely than ever before. It blows my mind that Jonathan and I are in charge of helping Isaac become a strong, compassionate, intelligent and (most importantly) happy person.
But with all of that said, I don't think it had really sunk in until this past Sunday night. Isaac was sleeping and Jonathan and I were watching the movie Hangover. We'd seen it before... pre-Isaac. Both of us thought it was funny, entertaining, etc, etc. Still do. But we noticed something completely different this time around, through the parent lens.
If you've seen it, do you remember the baby they find in a closet? And the baby waited until morning to cry? Remember how they carry the baby around in a front carrier all day and she's blissfully happy? Never needing to change positions or nap? And how they never feed her? And she's happy? And then they put an adult seat belt on her with no car seat? And leave her in the car alone with the windows cracked? And she watches bad guys bash their car in? I KNOW it's just a stupid movie, but I kept going back and forth between rolling my eyes ("Yeah right. THAT would never fly.") and wanting to reach into the tv and take care of this fake baby. And I wasn't the only one. Jonathan kept exclaiming over the way they were treating her. Realizing how different our movie experience was this time around, Jonathan said "Wow, it really is different when you have a kid!"
I guess you know it's for real when you watch a movie that's supposed to be about binge drinking, bachelor parties, and debauchery and all you can say is "But that poor baby!"
1. Sleeping gowns. It is such a relief to not have to mess with snaps in the middle of the night.
2. CD of womb sounds. When Isaac was teeny tiny we could turn this on and he was instantly lulled to sleep. Well, some of the time.
3. Little Noses saline spray and nose sucker thingie. Isaac had his first cold early on and couldn't even eat because he was so stuffed up and felt like he was drowning. He still gets congested during the night sometimes, so we use these a lot.
4. Baby carrier. I used the Moby when he was tiny, but now I prefer the Baby Bjorn. I wear him hiking, to the dog park, shopping, and just around the house when he refuses to be put down but I have things I need to do.
5. Aden and Anais swaddling blankets. Love, love, love, love, LOVE these. They are the only swaddling blankets that actually fit him after he was one week old. Plus, they double as a great stroller cover when he falls asleep. Perfect breathable material for a summer baby who loves to be swaddled!
6. Baby tub with hammock. Slippery baby problem solved!
7. Vibrating chair. For the first 6 weeks of Isaac's life, this kept us sane. He LOVED it. We still take it everywhere with us, although the magic seems to have worn off.
8. Swaddle Me blankets. These keep my baby warm and cozy at night and prevent him from waking up by punching himself in the face. Also gave me great peace of mind because I was paranoid that the swaddling blankets would come undone, cover his face, and smother him.
9. Nuks. Oh how I love thee.
10. Netflix. I have discovered shows like Dexter, United States of Tara, and Dead Like Me through the wonder of Netflix. When you spend at least five hours a day feeding your baby, you have to have SOMETHING to do! Especially if he has reflux and has fussy feedings and you need two hands to make it a successful eating experience. =)