When we made the decision to adopt, we felt like that was the Big Decision. We are going to adopt! Decision made. Done. Whew. Now everything just falls into place, right?
Not exactly. Turns out, there are about 130 million different ways to adopt. International? Domestic? Foster-to-adopt through your state agency? Pick one.
Domestic? Okay. Do you want to work with an attorney? An agency? A facilitator? Pick one.
Agency? All right, which one? Large? Small? Nationwide? Local? Affiliated with a certain faith? Pick one!
Do you want open adoption? Closed adoption? Do you feel prepared to parent a child with special needs? How do you feel about twins? How much time will you take off when the baby is born?
AGHHHH!!! For an easygoing Midwestern couple that can't even decide where to eat on a Friday night, this is a lot of decision making!
But, we did it. We're doing it. And we feel really good about our choices. At some point, it all just started to make sense and one direction felt more right than the others. Thank goodness. Now I can return the mountain of adoption books I borrowed from the library. Maybe.
2 comments:
Congratulations! I can not think of two people that will love a child anymore than you two! As a parent you always do your best to make the right decisions.Just follow your Heart. No parent will make the "right decision all of the time!"
We all do the best we can at that time! Take yourself off the hook.
Here is some advice for you to ponder.. Love the child everyday with all your heart! Except that child as a unique person and allow them to grow and find their way. Always stay on the same page with your husband or wife when you discipline the child. Believe it or not a child loves to know that you care enough to make the tough decisions. Well enough for now. Becky you know that I think you are a very special young lady!
Your spirit will be a blessing to your child! I am always proud of you. Love, Dad
I would have to say that the same goes for parenting! You think there's an obvious decision like, "I will put my baby in his crib on his back with no blanket and no lovie, because that's what the book says." But then in real life, when you've been awake for 20 hours and your child has reflux and and and... he seems to like resting on his tummy, then all of the sudden that obvious decision seems so gray! It sounds like you and Jonathan are having a really great warm-up to making those tough decisions, and lots of practice on talking through those decisions as a team! You guys are going to be wonderful parents, and I can't wait for the BIG BIG BIG day when your family grows! :)
Kels
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